When I was doing substance-abuse treatment, all those years ago, I had a certain number of clients how had histories of physical abuse with partners. All but one of the women were the recipients. I hated dealing with abused women, because, first, at the time, the folks on the referral lines (for emotional support, for shelter) always presumed that, as a man calling in, I was lying about being a counselor and having a referral, and instead wanted to find their location so that I could bring havoc down upon them, and second, because (in my experience anyway) the women always went back to the abuser. (I at least had some success in getting my alcohol and drug clients into recovery!)
Some of the men seemed to see the error of their ways... but most of 'em claimed that "she knew what she did; she made me hit her." I got so sick of hearing that refrain, that I came up with the following song parody:
You made me hit you,
I didn't wanna do it, I didn't wanna do it.
You made me hit you,
And all the time you knew it. You really put me through it.
You made me happy, sometimes, you made me sad,
And there were times when,
You made me get so mad.
You made me hit you,
I didn't wanna tell ya, you oughta go to hell ya,
I lost control, it's true (yes, it's true, yes, it's really really true).
I won't do that again, and that'll be my promise,
Until I do and you go sleepin' at your mama's,
You know you made me hit you.
(instrumental, because, of course...)
When the cops come we'll be runnin' helter-skelter,
I'll go to jail and you'll go to the women's shelter,
Because you made me hit you.
I sang it on a break at a state meeting, and was overheard by both my supervisor and department director. They were horrified that anyone in the counseling field could think such a thing was funny. Although it didn't actually come up in the termination, I'm sure this was part of the reason I got fired ten years ago.
It's good to be retired.
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